He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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