Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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