I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize