is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize