Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
where are you?
Hypothermia
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
