Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
