'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
i out mim tonsoeep
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