I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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