Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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