They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize