Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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