why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
