love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
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