Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
