Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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