I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
