It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize