Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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