I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
