got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
