There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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