Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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