i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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