So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize