quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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