Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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