I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
what day is it and did you see me today?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Randomize
