he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
