did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
