no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
