i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
you had me at cake vodka
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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