Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
