I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
