i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
