I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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