Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Randomize
