when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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