even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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