Buhtt sex?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
So. Much. Porn.
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