How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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