i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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