ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
