if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
well, you know. whores of a feather.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
