I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
