I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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