You work out of a Hotel?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
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