Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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