She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize