yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Say something about gay babies.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I need water and some morals
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
