are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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