Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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